THIS IS A LONG SHOT.

probably longer than ___ liking me back...

***

it's such a coincidence that i just came from a buddhist temple this morning. i just find one of its tenets very apt for the situation.

-desire is the root of all suffering.

desiring this thing is driving me nuts. however, according to the buddhist way of life, to be able to take out the suffering, you need to take out the desire. but this time, i choose to satisfy the desire, or at least, i'll try to.

i'm a big dreamer. but most of the time, i'm not as big a worker. but this time, i think i owe it to myself to at least try. i've already let too many opportunities pass by me. this time, i know that it will be better to have tried even if i fail than not to have tried at all. i owe myself the chance, even just a tiny bit of possibility, to fulfill my crazy dreams. they're crazy but not impossible.

i've always lived in the past and the future, never in the present. and i think it's high time that i start living in the present. i need to stop thinking of what-if's and what-might-have-been's. i need to stop putting off doing things in the future. i need to do something about my life, NOW!

i know that i can do this!

_________________________________________

Note: that was just me pep talk-ing myself. i need all the pep talks i can get if i really want to keep on with this journey.